was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
high people should be assigned attendants
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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