i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover