i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I just want to make out with him forever
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics