He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
