make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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