two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
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