I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
