i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
