4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
