it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Randomize
