I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
