OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I love you. Go after that dick
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