Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
