wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
