Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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