wake up i wanna do it froggy style
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize