I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
