He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
