We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
