so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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