it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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