we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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