Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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