You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
