shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
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She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
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It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
is it fun? or sober?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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