he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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