and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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