nut hugger
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
this just has baby written all over it
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
dude. I can hear the air.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
