Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Randomize
