My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize