My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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