dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
