Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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