so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize