It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Randomize