"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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