we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
