How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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