I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
