i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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