I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest