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• (773): View more from Illinois

  I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it

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• (713): View more from Texas

  You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.

  (925): View more from California

  I'm not gay.

  (713): View more from Texas

  Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?

  (925): View more from California

  If ghandi gives good head...I'm in

  (713): View more from Texas

  Its fine.

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome

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  17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"

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• (214): View more from Texas

  We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"

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  These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.

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• (409): View more from Texas

  I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN

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• (530): View more from California

  I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest

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