it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
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He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
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Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.