Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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