your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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