I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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