I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
why is half of my head shaved?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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