The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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