I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
