The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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