its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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