I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day