Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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