This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
i now understand why vodka
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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